Welcome to another edition of Fantasy Five Hundred, a new feature where we give a guest an imaginary £500 budget to spend on football shirts! What will they choose, new or old, quantity or quality, club or country? Let’s find out…
Today we’re looking at the picks of FSCentrals (@FSCentrals) who has curated some cultured choices with his £500. A couple of J-League beauties, Maradona on a mad one and Scotland’s Ajax impersonation all feature. Time to splash the cash:
PSG 95/96 AWAY
FSCentrals: ““This is one of those shirts that just works with the sponsor, love the contrast of the white and red and you can’t really go wrong with 90s Nike.”
Cost: £120, Total so far: £120
Like Bayern and Adidas, Nike and PSG are inseparable. Even putting aside the nostalgia factor it’s difficult to argue that their best work was produced in the 90s and this shirt is a shining example. Simple crest, Nike Futura logo, sublimated star pattern and the classic PSG tricolour palette. A beautiful design, recently revived for the 20/21 season.
ARGENTINA AWAY 94
FSCentrals: “I wasn’t even born during the 1994 World Cup but one of the first shirts I had as a kid was this shirt that my dad had bought. I want to own one of these again at some point, brings back so many memories.”
Cost: £130, Total so far: £250
Now, critics will try to tell you that the ‘94 World Cup was one of the boring ones (they should try 2010) but they clearly weren’t watching old Diego, off his tits on ephedrine, gurning at the camera after banging one in against Greece. If you want the look, you’ll have to fight FSCentrals for one of these nice looking Adidas template numbers. Drugs optional.
PARMA HOME 95/97
FSCentrals: “This could have been any one of the more out there 90s Serie A designs from Inter, Lazio or Parma but gone with this one for the sleeve pattern and the classic Parmalat sponsor, another one that just works so well with the shirt.”
Cost: £85, Total so far: £335
If ever there was a shirt that deserved to be long sleeve, it’s this. Look at the design, then look closer. The yellow and blue work great against the white, but look at the gradient ‘spatter’ effect in the blue. The pin-striping that fences the pattern in. The shadows in the white fabric. The Puma ‘King’ logo. Definitely earned its place in this collection.
SCOTLAND AWAY 20/21
FSCentrals: “Ashamed to admit this but I don’t actually own a Scotland shirt, but the current away shirt which shares the Ajax template from 20/21 is a cracker, a design that I think will be a classic in years to come.”
Cost: £35, Total so far: £370
Scotland have had some great shirts over the years, the tartan patterned one from Euro ‘96, the salmon pink pinstriped away from the early ‘90s, but this -as far as I know- is the first time they’ve ever shared a design with Ajax. Not to be deliberately contrarian (the Ajax version was lauded as one of the shirts of the year) but I actually prefer this version to its Dutch counterpart. It suits the lighter colour a lot better, nicely contrasted with the navy blue collar and cuffs. The Ajax shirt may have seen more success, but Scotland wins the sartorial victory.
TOKYO VERDY AWAY 95/96
FSCentrals: “I have been desperately looking for one of these, but can’t find one big enough! 90s J League shirts are up there with the Serie A on designs in my opinion.”
Cost: £70, Total so far: £440
Mizuno. They’re never really brought up in the conversation when we talk about the great kit makers over the years and it’s hard to know why. While we were in the playground arguing over whether Adidas or Nike had the better trainers, Mizuno were playing the long game, making shirts like this to become hipster favourites in 30 years time. Not that FSCentrals is a hipster, mind.
GAMBA OSAKA HOME 93/95
FSCentrals: “What’s not to love about this! Another J league classic, the design being implemented into the collar and cuffs sets this Gamba Osaka above the rest.”
Cost: £55, Grand Total: £495
When did shiny fabric become so unpopular? Give me a fabric so shiny I can see my face in it. So shiny that it blinds airline pilots on sunny days. I want it to generate enough static electricity to make everyone within a one mile radius have hair like Ken Dodd. Don’t tell me it doesn’t look good, Gamba Osaka are here proving that it does.
What a mix. And yet again the 90s makes a case for itself to be the best decade for football shirts. Big thanks to FSCentrals for taking part, make sure to give him a follow on Twitter (@FSCentrals). Do you have a favourite? How would you spend differently? Head over to Twitter to discuss! The next Fantasy Five Hundred will be coming soon!
Kit For Brains 
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